Compilation of Pet Peeves from YahooSprinterVan
9.5 quarts
Now what are you going to do with that last pint of motor oil? Most dealers just dump it in!
15" wheels
Something so big equipped with tires that are so small? Fine in EU with lots of tire suppliers. But what was DC thinking for the US market?
ASSYST reset
Put your hands through the steering wheel while turning the key to exactly position 2 or 0 while counting to ten or it chimes. Oh, you screwed up? Too bad, back to default.
Anonymous
A Freightliner Sprinter that loses its "Freightliner" emblem. As the time for Freightliner dropping Sprinters approaches, it seems old Freightliners are, in turn, shedding their Freightliner branding, leaving 5 or 6 dots of construction adhesive visible. Probably related to "Orphan" Sprinter syndrome (see below)
Are you a Bosch, ATE or Teves Sprinter? Most automobile manufacturers purchase parts and assemblies from others. DC is no different. But the manufacturers usually require the supplied parts be interchangeable. Not so with Mercedes. Sprinter brakes as supplied by at least three different suppliers, each using a different brake pad design that are not interchangeable. Crawl under the van and look at the front and rear brakes for the stamp. Must take off the wheel for the front. Information is not in the VIN records.
Buzz-buzz
Must be the electric door locks on the fritz again because of a bump in the road, an oversensitive control card, or just for the heck of it.
Clock
Good German time chips are so much superior to those cheap Asian ones. Who cares about a little loss in time? Don't you have a Seiko to keep your appointments by?
Dodge
Management suffers from "not invented here" syndrome; they can't figure out why people flip out of the RAM 3500.
Driver's side bracket
Now what in the world is that thing for anyway? At least it has a part number in case you need to replace it!
Driver's side cup holders
Put your head below the level of the dashboard while reaching for the cup in the cupholder
Driving south in the morning; driving north in the evening Get an eyeful of sun as the visor doesn't rotate to the left
Dualee's 42" clearance
US standard is 48" minimum clearance between wheel wells. Was DC trying to maintain the Sprinter's lean and svelte profile?
External Air Filter Air Mass Sensor Maybe it works when the van is running at 2300 rpm and 70mph. Just open the hood and see!
Find the switch Must be hiding behind the shifter or the stearing wheel
Freightliner
Pity the Sprinter Freightliner dealer - promised the Sprinter to make up for massive losses when DC's big-rig marketing strategy back-fired, at the cost of million or so per dealer and two computer system changes [first to Mercedes, then to Dodge], only to have all the 2001 and most of the 2002 inventory sold out from under them by DC to FedEx and UPS, then 2003 Dodge takes more inventory away, and now Freightliner is to lose the whole Sprinter franchise to Dodge in 2006. No wonder car dealers have such a bad reputation!
Fresh air
Only filtered air is permitted to circulate inside a Sprinter. That is why no windows in the back open unless you order us to do it.
Fuel filter
Hard to tell that Mercedes has been doing this probably longer than any other manufacturer. An easy task as performed by most others; for the Sprinter unreasonably difficult. But, never fear, they came up with a partial solution - at 4 times the cost of the first try!
Ideographs
Forget Guttenburg and movable type - it is back to picture drawings to communicate. Now how would a German picture a driver's side lock?
Insulation
You mean insulation is intended to reduce heat transmission? And it can be used to deaden sound also? DC thinks it is just intended as filler to back up the liners! And you don't need much to do that job.
Key jamming
The sport of finding the location for the ignition in the dark, and jamming the key into the gap between the ignition switch and steering wheel cowling instead
Lazy fuel gauge
You only really need to know when the tank is nearing empty, and the gauge does a good job at that.
Mercedes - USA We have no association with something as low class as a van - or their customers.
Moveable seats
Certainly the seats are moveable - in and out. Why would anyone possibly want to move the seats to a different location within the van? Unimagineable.
Note clip
Great for the driver to practice multi-tasking, as the note clip is too far away to read any attached notes, too far away to reach, and needs two hands to operate.
One eyed Sprinter
Get that dashing pirate look when one or both headlights die. Headlights seem to have a short lifespan with Sprinters.
Orphan Sprinters
2001 through late 2003 Freightliner Sprinters, whose ECMs were not readable by Dodge dealers certified to service Sprinters. West Coast owners of these Orphan Sprinters didn't even have orphanages to go to, as there were no certified Freightliner or Dodge Sprinter dealers in California or Nevada for these years' Sprinters. [Note: Dodge now claims to have the equipment to read 2001-2003 Sprinters' ECUs.]
Now Freightliner is abandoning Sprinters end of 2021.
Ouch
The sound of someone getting a hernia moving the passenger seats in or out of the van!
Paper disposal Sprinter comes with its own waste paper disposer - just put any flat sheets of paper/maps in the lower door storage areas, and the paper will magically slip out of the slot coveniently provided at the bottom. [Fix with duct tape.]
Passenger's side cupholders Spread your legs to use these cupholders
Ping-ping
The sound of another chip on the hood for those without clear coat paint jobs or paint protection film
Rear passenger seat cup holders Who draws the unlucky straw and has to sit between a cup holder and its user?
Rumble Strip
No need to drive over a rumble strip to have that rumble strip feeling! Sprinters of all years have this feature built in as the electronic transmission in low load situations hunts for the optimal gear. DC denies the vibration exists or that there is a problem. No known cure. See YahooSprinterVan Post 23857 and thread.
Sergeant Shultz "I know nothing!!!" The response from DC at all levels with regard to long-term issues like tire valves, EGRs, and rumble strip vibration.
Shearing pulleys If in a 2005 at highway speeds, don't get clipped by shearing crankcase pulleys! (and hope it flies off in a downward direction!!!!)
Speedometer
We know that Big Brother is watching. So we programed the computer to make you think that you are going 3 mph faster than you really are so you won't get a ticket. Isn't that thoughtful of us?
Sprinter Watershed
That massive windshield and hi-top collects large quantities of rain and debris (especially in fall), all washing downhill into the hidden valley behind the hood. The valley floods, as there are only two small subterranean exits for the water, and they often clog, creating ponds for algea, protozoa, tadpoles and other swamp life to grow. See YahooSprinterVan Post 30196 for more.
Sprinter's Trailer lighting harness
A brillant electrical engineering feat that provides a complicated and costly solution to a simple problem
The Hump
The mole of a growth located on the back roof of a Sprinter that replaced the ineffective interior mount Bump AC in early models.
Transponder key range
The Sprinter is so big it blocks reception of its own transponder key when approached from the rear; from the front or side 20 feet on a good day
Vibrating driver's floor board Foot massage provided by 2004's vibrating fuel lines!
Washing
Invest in ladders and scaffolding to reach the top and roof. Or take the philosophy that what you can't see won't matter.
What is a lumbar support? It is the hand-squeezing balloon thing DC provides to give drivers and passengers tension relief. Certainly never works anything else in the seats.
Where is your transit?
NO, not the Ford Transit If you are low on fuel, better be traveling, parking on level ground, or near a diesel pump, or face the DREADED REPRIME.